Allure

the fool.

Date :
Time :
Title :

Tired from the trip I went to M'sia.

Damn tired.

Woke up at 5!

Somemore last night slept late.

Like 12 plus then sleep.

Haizz.

At least last night got reply.

From him lorhs.

Haha.

I am still scared by the nightmare last night.

Dun wish anything happen to that person.

Really larhs.

Just now was a terrible time.

Dun want to travel overseas anymore,

Have a phobia for it.

Some more disputes are all over the places.

Duh...

Dun want go M'sia le.

haha.

Scared le.

I really hope can drag kor back to church.

haha.

Erm.. Should I go to church???

This week????

Still quite confused.

GTG:)

Date :
Time :
Title :

ARgh..

Sudden plan.

Going to M'sia!

OMG

Luckily not staying there haha.

I will miss him and my friends a lot if I go there.

Really.

But maybe buying or shopping for a while.

Before coming back to S'pore.

Haizz. What happen to him?

Never reply my msg.

Haha.

I am angry:)

No larhs.

Must be tired or dun understand my msg

Or dun want to rply my msg

I dunnoe.

I dun want to assume anything.

Cos' I dun want to jump to the conclusion.

But still miss him.

Date :
Time :
Title :

Reflecting the days that have passed.

The days where a lot of things happened.

A lot of the time I really wished to fade away from everything.

But am I letting myself down?

Am I putting god's faith down?

I knew a lot of nonsence had happened to me.

Like today.

I am supposed to go for a outing.

For SJ.

But I chose to stay at home.

Cos' I dun really think that I am a group with them.

That's why I escape from a lot of things.

Even if I go.

Even if God tell me I am doing the wrong thing.

I will still not choose to go there.

Cos' once I go,

I will only be alone.

I am really dissapointed.

With myself.

For giving up so early.

SO fast.

And so rashly.

I really dunnoe what happens.

I start to wait again.

Last night send one sms.

Got no reply.

Duh.

Waited till 2 plus.

Still no rply.

I really missed you.

But he dunnoe.

I onli can pray that God will let me have a wise decison about

This new chance of liking him is kind of crazy.

I dunnoe why.

I juz feel that he is quite different than last time.

Big Differences.

But one of them consists of.

Not replying my sms.

haha.

Really....

But I guess staying up for him is pointless.

But just try to make a possibility of not giving up.

And I always need some time alone.

But it didnt meant that I am always emo.

Cos' I got some problems with peoples.

That's why.

A fake smile is needed at times when you don't really feel like smiling.

But the words that you tell me.

Is always going through my mind.

like a recorder.

I understand there are minimal posibility

for me and him.

Although I still have feelings for him.

But I know that sometimes I must not focus on him too much.

Yeah,,'

I really feel like smiling

but today isnt the day,

Haizz.

Waited for his sms for like 24 hours

Still no rply.

But have two friends with me

and supporting me.

But I have a lot of quotes for them.

Friends help you mature emotionally and spiritually.

Friends teach you about forgiveness.

Friends love you no matter what.

They are true friends that really helped me alot.

In terms of my spiritual ways with god.

Although I sinned to god,

by slashing and hurting his creation.

I am really trying my very best to heal this patch of wounds.

Simple word to him.

I will wait for you till you come and talk to me.

Cos' no one can replace this place execpt you.

Date :
Time :
Title :

I need sometime to make my heart heal.

I am too complicated.

I am quite missing him.

I can't say goodbye to you.

I am really enjoying talking to him.

But I know he likes someone else.

I , on the other hand, will not go too in love with him.

I am really happy cos'

Maybe this week meeting to go to CHC.

But duh...

I dunnoe.

Later if my heart really trembles too much.

Then how?

I only can tell him.

I am fine.

But inside me I slash my wrists

Cos' I really like you.

But I guess I am too confused.

I am too confused whether you really like me.

Then although he was a gangster.

He got piercing before.

But he has changed a lot.

...

No matter what ILY.

May god bless everyone to have everlasting friendship and love.

Bless you.

Date :
Time :
Title :

IF you really think that I am an extra in your life.

I am totally fine to get out of it.

I always thought you are the strength that I find.

But in your changes.

I started to feel that our friendship is fading.

Quitting Church will do.

If you really feel that.

I am really not in a mood to talk.

Sorry for giving you the black face.

Sorry for giving you the attitude.

And really sorry to give you so many troubles.

I am outta of your life.

And you may consider to cancel me from your friends' list.

I really dont understand.

I am just close to your friend.

And now you make me feel like I shouldnt talk to anyone.

Really.

I am damn dissapointed in my decision of choice.

But if you will to understand what happen to me.

You will totally feel like going to hell.

I am really upset

Cause' I never thought you will feel jealous about friendship.

Since you think that she belong to you.

And I should be friends with her.

So be it.

I am really giving up hope on everything,

Even you.

I am really hating this life.

Which is going to turn more and more upside down,

I dun blame anyone for that.

But the most important person I blame is myself.

I dun want to make that guy noe that I go slashing again.

I dont want to let things turn this way.

But if really you dun want me to get involved in any of your stuff.

Then well.

I am leaving.

CoS' you are a friend who really let me to a direction where I find no courage to talk to you.

There isn't a need to talk to me.

NOt even about my problems.

I am really having a phobia of trusting a friend.

There arent true and good friendship.

It really hurts.

I dun want to cry anymore.

I just want to go into a deep sleep where no pain will ever be curve in my heart.

I am deeply injured.

Dont talk to me.

Just leave me alone.

Date :
Time :
Title :

Cried the whole night.

Scolded myself.

I still hate myself.

I kind of still felt very hurt.

Cause my friend really hurt me so much.

SO much.

That I really want to go away from church.

Any place for me to hide.

Then I go hide.

Really I dont want to get hurt so often.

Damn myself for trusting you so much.

Dun ever blame yourself.

Never thought that I will be outta of your life.

I am going to be out of your life.

Very soon.

Very very soon.

Perharps starting from today.

Never thought that you will think that I am snatching your friend.

After all,

I am not important to anyone.

I really still dunnoe why I trusted you so much.

Damn me.

I am really too soft hearted.

To let things go.

That's why I often put the blame on myself.

I am quite not happy about my surrounding.

I am going to change from this very moment.

If you want to speak to me,

I just listen.

And after that avoid you.

Then what else can I do?

I am too stupid to put in all my trust on to you guys.

I am MIA-ing

Not cos of you.

But I am an extra in this world.

FCuk-my life.

Date :
Time :
Title :

Today is Open Saturday.

Actually supposed to go Escape theme park one.

But I am sick so that why...

After sleeping till 10 plus.

Then Prepare to go to church.

Actually what I thought today's open sat will be

Is more fun.

But it turns out to be more lame than I thought.

The groupings turn out more shocking.

Same group with SB larhs.

Then...

He kept saying nonsence larhs.

Almost laugh at everything.

But I wasnt prepared to fall into the hole.

Until Service...

Then I cried in service.

And kept shaking my head cos

He kept coming to my mind.

Duh...

Haizz.

Confusing,

But things have to be like that lorhs,

After that he prayed for me all those...

(he know I go slash myself.):(

Duh...

Havent sms him to thank him yet.

Later.

To my sweetie and hunny.

I am going through tough times.

Meanwhile I am trying to fall out of the hole.

Anyway dun get to bother my problems.

I guess there isnt any solution.

But time will settle all things.

I got a swollen eye.

haha.

Monkeys go slap him....:)))))

Blessed everyone who is sick like me.

profile

My name is Ahh-T0ng. World-hater. Hate me.I don't fcuk care, A twist in my story, when he shoot me three times in my heart.

wishlist

- Breathe.
- Live as independent lady.
- Mature more.
- Love? Exclude me.
- Be a hate about love.

plurk.

Plurk.com